Peter lets the memory of 3P down.

 Okay, let's go back to 1966. St. Patrick's College graded third form students (now called 'year 9') into four classes - 3P, 3G, 3M and 3R.

Everybody knew that 3P stood for 3 Professional and 3G stood for 3 General. Most suspected that 3M stood for something like 3 Moderate. Most referred to 3R as 3 Retarded. Though, it might have meant 3 Remedial. A little later the powers that be changed the names of those last two classes to 3 Com. (3 Commercial), and 3R became 3M. 3M was then often referred to as 3 Moron. 

Anyway, a young boy named Peter easily made it into 3P. 

In 3P students learnt the 'smart' subjects. They studied things like Open Heart Surgery, Rocket Propulsion and Neuroscience.

The 3G boys studied more general things like English Grammar, French (in case there was another war) and Bookkeeping.

The 3M (later called 3 Com.) boys learnt things like Typewriter Maintenance, How To Make Bicycle Deliveries and How To Converse With A Plumber.

The boys in 3R studied subjects like How To Put Your Trousers On Correctly, Trolley Bus Fares and Jobs You Must Do For Yourself In An Asylum.

One of the most important subjects taught in 3P was Latin. For years the boys were able to impress their friends by using phrases like 'Mea Culpa'.

However, their English suffered. One thing Peter struggled with throughout his life was the use of commas.

His friend Richard (of RBB) was in 3G and, subsequently, has had to help Peter over the years with his English grammar.

Here is a recent example...

Can you guess where a comma could have gone?

At least then we would be clear about what Peter was trying to say.

Which of these did Peter mean to say?

• Robert would interpret that sarcasm you used as being irony.
• Robert would interpret your remark as being sarcastic, but you used irony.

This would be a good time for Peter to say, "Mea culpa." but he'll probably say, "Sheesh!"

Ciao tutti.