I posted recently a parable about a man with four goats who had two sons. Two regular fans of this blog, Peter and Robert the forgiven, became very curious about the fate of the remaining three goats.
I'm glad they took the parable seriously and it's good to see them concerned about the three remaining goats who escaped becoming goat burgers.
The father kept the other three goats.
The vegan son made it his mission to look after these three animals, despite having showed little interest initially. As I told you, he already had a cat.
Many people had liked the younger son's goat burgers and he saw a business opportunity. He planned to open a business called Goat Burger King. He asked his father if he could have the remaining three goats. His father was aware that the older boy had developed a friendship with the animals. He even took them to church.
The three goats on their way to church. |
Then, one Sunday, disaster struck. One of the goats ate a bible at church. Fr. Dr. Grunter O.B.E., the parish priest, was not impressed. He locked the bible eating goat in the confessional (on the priest's side). The elder boy took the other two home. A local man came to make a confession and was unaware that he was actually confessing to a goat.
The man asked, "What is my penance?"
The goat bleated, but it sounded pretty much like the grunts that Fr. Dr. Grunter O.B.E. often made when he gave out penances.
The man took it to mean that he should say five Hail Marys but, in fact, the man should have been saying six Our Fathers for the sins he had committed. Unfortunately, on his way out of the church, the man suffered a fatal heart attack. He went straight to Hell because he had not done the correct penance for his particular types of sins.
The only 'person' who could possibly have known about the man's fate was the goat. Unfortunately, he could not communicate with people. Maybe he could have grunted to Fr. Dr. Grunter O.B.E., but that probably didn't happen.
Eventually the priest gave the goat back to the older son and told him not to bring the goats to church again.
The boy started taking the goats to a Presbyterian church where they were more appreciated. The elder boy grew up to become a vicar. The younger boy never got his goat burger venture off the ground and later went into the wine business. He became a bit of a wine bore.
Okay, I hear you say, "But what happened to the three goats?"
I want you to close your eyes and use your imagination. Did they go into show biz? Did they form a violin trio? Did they finish up on a plate? Did they become police goats?
Use your imagination but don't bother me with your ideas.
19 commenti:
'The boy started taking the goats to a Presbyterian church where they were more appreciated. The elder boy grew up to become a vicar.'
This is wrong.
Following a pattern set in the first congregation of Christians in Jerusalem described in the Book of Acts in the New Testament, the Presbyterian church is governed by presbyters (a term and category that includes elders and Ministers of Word and Sacrament, historically also referred to as "ruling or canon elders". The elder son then could simply be called an Elder.
"Use your imagination but don't bother me with your ideas."
I'm surprised that man in the confessional was able to confess without the goat butting in.
Sorry, did I say I wanted puns?
You are wanting though.
I don't want though. There are plenty of other words I can use.
Don’t let Robert hear you say that as he’d accuse you of blasphemy. In his view the Word is God.
Maybe Though is God?
Look out! Robert's trying to get your goat now.
I don't comment on Robert's posts anymore because I'm sure he deleted a couple of my comments.
Richard (of RBB)
Robert 'Bowdler' Prowse.
Robert, proving he’s Robert-kind of like a fingerprint.
Well, he did receive forgiveness from Richard (of RBB).
Kind of like winning a tiddly-winks competition.
How many goats have you got left?
Comments are slowing down. Maybe you need to rethink your "I wont comment on Robert's blog' policy.
Only if you improve the grammar in your comments.
Richard (of RgrammaticalBB)
Don’t go into the goat selling business. Your consumer communication is appalling.
Jesus and Satan are working together.
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