Sabato. 31 agosto.

 Now that Roberto has laid claim to the Italian thing, I've decided to switch my energy to the trumpet.

I only have a plastic trumpet, but that's okay - I do have a very good mouthpiece.

I'd like to build up a bit of a trumpet repertoire and increase my range a bit. It's ages since I've taken the trumpet seriously, but it'll be a bit of fun. Anyway, I have no one to talk Italian to these days, so why bother?

I think I'll kick off with Autumn Leaves. The trumpet is a transposing instrument, so you have to relearn all your tunes a tone higher. For example, I usually play Autumn Leaves in Gm, so it'll be in Am on the trumpet. No big deal.

Now that's a big deal!

Well, I'd better get on with it.

Bye.

Wednesday, 28th. September.

 That's not today's date, that's when this guy last posted.

At least, unlike Roberto l'italiano, he's not sucking up to Tent Horn.

Hey, does Roberto have two names?

Why didn't Roberto say that in Italian?

"Un promemoria tempestivo per stare attenti là fuori."

Of course he speaks Italian! Otherwise, explain the name Roberto Testore.

Oh well, weirder things happen in TC's posts - read my last post to see.

Ciao.

Since when has apple sauce been red?

 Okay, okay, I know there are red apples, but I'm talking about the stuff that is white and is inside the apple. Though I suppose the colour might change if you added a chilli, or two, or three, or four, or five, or more!

Anyway, have a look at this.

Hang on, let's go in a bit closer.

Yes, it's apple sauce - made by Barker's - but some idiot has added chilli. I think it must be used by August 24th., but it doesn't say which year.

What sort of an idiot would add chilli to apple sauce?

We know the answer...

It's that blogger whose name starts with 'The' and contains the word 'mud'.

You can look him up on our LINKS service.

Ciao.

Where's my f**king rosin?

 Okay, let's get a few trivial matters out of the way first:

• No one really cares if you're making stuff with chillies in it.
• Been to the tip? No one really cares.
• About to practise and you can't find Your rosin? THIS IS SERIOUS!

Peanut Butter? Who really cares.

I've done quite a bit of violin practice today, but now it's time to spend some time on my double bass.

Here is the piece I will practise today.

Se Solo - it means 'If Only'.
I hope that Rob doesn't steal that.

Okay, I'm going to need some bass rosin (a thing that you put on your bow to make it grip), but where is it?

Look carefully.

Here it is?

If this post is more interesting than Peter (aka The Curmudgeon) bottling cucumber? 

Please leave a comment to let me know.

Ciao tutti.

Will it get emptied today?

 

Monday is probably a quiet day at the tip. Hey, you could probably even get away with having a piddle there undetected. You might even be lucky enough to find a golf ball.

Man up TC!

Sunday.

 Peter (aka The Curmudgeon) sat up in bed.

Should he take the trailer to the tip?

No, it would be busy and he wasn't much good at backing a trailer. 

No, that's not how he put it. Let's read it in his own words.

"I'll go when it's quieter. I'm OK with reversing a trailer but, like peeing at a urinal or teeing off at golf I prefer to do it without too many people about."

Whatever.

I guess the message we can take from this is, "If Peter is peeing at a urinal, stay well clear."

So, that means he won't be able to write Part 2 of his very popular post 'There You Go...'.

* * *

Talking about teeing off at golf, Robert (aka Roberto Testore) was busy opening up the church shop.

He knew he'd feel better after his morning wafer, but his first job was to load up the condom dispenser. It reminded him of a 'joke' he had come across on Facebook.

He had left a comment saying, "Rubbish." This got him suspended from a NDE group. So, now he had returned to blogging. In any case, the condom dispenser at church was quite popular. He wished that he'd kept a few wafers that Peter had offered him on their last meeting.

* * *

Project Violin 100 is coming along, but slowly. Some of the problems presented need a lot of thinking about. Still, it's early days. Chi va piano va sano e va lontano.

I think I'd better do some jazz violin practice today, and some double bass. 

Rome wasn't built in a day.

Ciao.

Have fun Peter but do not sin.

 Peter was thinking as he drove around the bays towards the club. He was thinking of all the bad drivers, and dangerous drivers, around Whangarei.

Then he realized that he was driving on the wrong side of the road.

A mistake made by an old fellow. Was that a sin? He thought of Robert's advice (see heading). He wondered if Robert followed his own advice. Was fantasizing about female saints like Maria Goretti a sin?

"Why does that guy keep
praying to me?"

Peter thought that Robert might be better off praying to Saint Pius X.

Peter wondered what the 'X' stood for.

Was it a short way to show that he had or knew 'xtra' stuff?

Anyway, it was now time to think about golf.

"If I hurry, there'll be time to climb down and find a few 'xtra' balls." For some reason, his mind briefly turned back to St. Pius. He made himself think of golf, because today he had a special challenge.

He called it Project Golf 27. His aim was to go around nine holes in just 27 strokes of the ball.

When he told some of his golf buddies they thought he was dreaming, but Peter's mind was made up. Every shot would have to be perfect. He'd practised for a while with his project in mind. 

One thing was for sure - it would be very hard to accomplish. Only three shots for every hole. Sheesh! 

This day it was not to be. The first hole took him 5 shots. That left 22 shots for the other eight holes. He decided that today would be a practice day. That was a good call because it took him 48 shots to complete the nine holes. Peter decided to look for some more balls. That always made him feel better.

"Sheesh!"

 

Hey, what's happening around the blogs?

 That's an easy question to answer...

NOTHING.

Well, except for the great work that Richard's Bass Bag* is doing in this crisis!

No doubt Peter, of The Curmudgeon Ink, has been busy upsetting others at tennis and looking for golf balls on the golf course.

Hey! You're not supposed to take balls that are
still in play!

Robert, as you probably know, has grown a beard, changed his name, and has moved to Facebook, where he is writing about saints and the like. Talking about the word 'like', he doesn't seem to be getting many of those.

 

* * *

Okay, I know, I've always been a bit of a devil.

Even in my younger years!

You can understand now why
I had no trouble getting girlfriends.

Okay, that's not entirely true. Hey, but this is my blog, and I can say what I like. Let's face it, there is not much competition these days. 

Today I'll do more work on Project Violin 100, and I'll try to get some quality bass practice done. 

I'll leave you there for now. 

Ciao tutti.

* the original bass bagging site

Project Violin 100 update.

 So, Robert has packed up his blog and moved to Facebook and is using an Italian name - Roberto Testore. I hope he recognises the significance of the name Testore. Ah, he'll look it up on his old friend Google.

Giovanni says, "I'm holding it, Rob."

By the way, Giovanni is pronounced Jovanni.

Anyway, back on topic, I have now completed 15 hours of this project. Hey, that's not all the practice I do! Other things need practising too. I'm making progress, but some aspects slow me down - a sign that I need to do lots of SLOW practice. Will I get there in 85 more hours? I hope so. Only time will tell, but I'm not giving up.

Now that Robert has moved on, Peter will need to get used to reading posts about musical instruments; that Catholic thing could become a thing of the past. There will probably be less stories based around the church shop.

Father Orange could become a distant memory.

"Squeeze me, baby."

Along with some of the old saints.

Maria Goretti

And Broadway Jesus.

"Sheesh!"

Hopefully Peter will be reading up on how the violin and double bass are strung and tuned.

"Sheesh! They never taught 
us this in 3P!"

Now that Peter's regular readership has been essentially reduced to 1, let's hope that he's up to making the necessary changes.

Good luck to The Curmudgeon Ink.

Oh, and HERE is a tune to cheer you all up.

Then there were two.

 This is what greets you if you go to Robert's blog.

If you follow the link to his Facebook page, you find a site where he goes by the name Roberto Testore.

Is Robert trying to hide his identity? The Italian name is certainly confusing. I wonder where he got it from?

Now our blogging community consists of Richard's Bass Bag* and a swag of blogs that make up The Curmudgeon Ink**.

Never mind, you'll still find what you want at 'the bag'.

* the original bass bagging site

** where you can learn about fences and missing buses in Christchurch

Age waits for no one, neither does Hell.

 Thanks, Rob, for the very nice bottle of Chardonnay... and the mask.

On my 72nd birthday I feel
a bit of a devil!

Okay, I think I get the message... I'm going to Hell.

Actually, it's quite a big message to tell someone that they're going to Hell (if that is Rob's intention).

Should I feel worried?

Should I be concerned?

After all, the 'sentence' is for eternity - a very, very, very long time.

I guess it all depends on Catholics being correct about their predictions.

Catholics seem to know that they are right in their thinking, but the rest of us might not agree.

Okay, it's an interesting scenario - an all-loving god makes a lot of humans.

He kicks off with a man and a woman.

Then a 'devil', disguised as a talking snake, sort of mucks it all up.

As a consequence, all humans are burdened with a package called Original Sin.

Suddenly, you have to love this god or you'll be tormented for eternity.

* * *

But, what if it's all bullshit?

I almost can't wait to die and find out!

Hey, there could be a lot of very disappointed Catholics, including the ones who fucked up the lives of many people AND CHILDREN.

As I get old, I'm looking forward with interest.

Tra il dire e il fare c'e` di mezzo il mare.

Yes, I am Bach.

 ...to a birthday present from Robert!

Thank you, Rob!

I dropped one off to him too, as we do.*

We've been up to Tuakau to see our special Sri Lankan friends. Unfortunately, the weather turner ugly for our long ride home - dark with very heavy rain. This made our return south a long, arduous journey, though no one else seemed to slow down. La mamma degli imbecilli e` sempre incenta.

Now we're home safe and sound. 

There were no bus dramas on the way. Mainly because we did all our travelling by car. There's a lesson for Peter.

I'll leave it there for tonight.

Ciao tutti.

ps. sorry that there are no pictures.

* being brothers born three years and one day apart

Again, I'll be Bach.

 

Okay, I'm going to be away for five days - don't worry, there will be no bus dramas, and I'll make sure that Shelley has her phone. If, and I say if, there was a minor bus drama, like Peter suffered, I'd have to do a post late next Monday when I return.

I'm aware that all Robert's posts have gone again and that The Curmudgeon Ink is writing a lot of shit lately is struggling to get back into form after being away, but I'll be writing comments on this post. So don't worry, I'll keep you posted on any interesting events.

Ciao for now.

Our little blogging community.

 

There's not much happening around here.

Project Violin 100 discussed.

Robert: Hi Peter, where are you?

Peter: Just about to board a flight for home. I hope it's not a doozy, like the flight we took to Dunedin!

Robert: Yes, I'm looking forward to that post! Ha, ha, I sent a link to Richard of two double bassists playing Flight of the Bumble Bee. I asked if that is his big project.

Peter: Yes, I had a look. Did you notice that they're both the same guy, playing the same bass? They've also got a little thing, near the bridge, that looks like a tuner. Is he, they, having trouble playing in tune? Anyway, Richard specifically mentions the violin. Maybe he's working on some Ry Cooder?

Robert: Maybe I need to pray to St. Therese of Lisieux? Maybe he's working on a hymn?

Peter: Maybe his alter egos will be playing in the backing band? Sheesh! They're quite a pack of boasters!

Robert: But you have quite a number of alter egos, The Religious Curmudgeon, The Bagpipes Curmudgeon, that lady who gives advice... I can go on.

Peter: Well, so do you! The Holy Ghost, Mary, St. Therese. I can go on too.

Robert: I will pray to Mary to forgive you.

Peter: Sheesh! Oh, thanks, I guess.

Project Violin 100 Update.

 9 hours done - 91 to go.

Robert: I can guess what he's practising.

Peter: Well, I can bet it's not a hymn. Maybe he has finally taken up the bagpipes.

Robert: No, my wiser and older brother will probably be pushing the limits of violin playing. I suspect Bach.

Peter: Nah, you're just promoting that Arnold Schwarzenegger joke.

Robert: God loves you, Peter. Well done.

Peter: Then why did the All Blacks need to lose?

Robert: To make people understand that abortion is bad. God works in mysterious ways. Hey, men are in charge here.

Peter: But whose body is it?

Robert: God made it, and he impregnated Mary. I guess he saved Joseph the job. He could then concentrate on his carpentry skills.

Peter: Okay, good point. Do you know any good hairdressers? I need a haircut.

Robert: Jesus wore long hair, AND make up. That was the fashion in the Middle East back then.

Peter: Oh, okay. I'll see if Lynn will lend me some eye shadow.

Hey! Akish is back posting!

 HERE!

I'd keep an eye on some of the blogs in our LINK list.

AND...

 Richard's Bass Bag 3 is back too!

HERE!

It feels like Christmas!

"I'm Bach."

 Time to go check out Richard's Bass Bag 2...

HERE!

Project Violin 100.

 I've just clocked up another 15 minutes. I know, Peter spends longer in the toilet, but it was time well spent (for me, I don't know what Peter gets up to in there).

Remember, Peter, the job's not over until the paperwork is done.

On this project repetition is important, but so is having a plan. This task covers twelve parts, all with their little (well, rather big, actually) problems to solve. I have covered the first three parts and am practising the beginnings of seven other parts. Obviously, I need to keep going over the bits that I have learnt.

Hang on, I think that Peter is finished in the bathroom. About time.

Lynn will be saying, "Come on Matey, we didn't come all this way so that you can spend it in the bathroom!"

Peter will probably go for a walk this morning. Yes, I know, he'll get lost and it will take longer than planned. He'll be wearing his thermal gear. I don't think he will have taken his fancy gumboots. At least, I hope not. For Lynn's sake.

Well, that's it for now.

Ciao.

Just 93 hours to go!

 No, I'm not talking about when Robert will next delete his blog, and all his past comments, I'm talking about Project Violin 100.

Seven hours down! 

Remember that Project Violin 100 started on 29/7/24 - 13 days ago, so I'm pretty pleased with this progress. This project does not make up my total practice for each day, there is also double bass practice and 'general' violin practice to do. This project contains very demanding stuff. 

It's Saturday, a day when some Catholics will sneak along to Mass to avoid having to go on Sunday. I have no plans yet for today or tomorrow. Except practice. Monday I will find out about what happened to Professor Longhair at the start of the Dunedin trip.

As far as I know, he still hasn't had a haircut.

Here are a few possibilities of what might have happened:

• He wet himself on the plane.
• He found golf balls, under his seat, on the plane.
• He upset a pregnant passenger on the plane.
• The plane had problems and had to land on a football field.
• They wouldn't let him into Dunedin because his hair was too long.
• Security at Dunedin airport said he was too old.
• He wet himself in the airport terminal.
• He saw the pope in the airport terminal.
• Someone mistook him for Donald Trump.
• He decided to walk from the airport into town and got lost.

I guess we'll just have to wait until Monday.

Oh, and here's a picture of me in a band, Skid Row, in the late 1970s. 

See you later.

"Doozy' promises from one, nothing from the other.

This is what is happening on the blogs.

Okay, I had a look around the blogs this morning.

Robert's blog first.

Nothing!

Not a single parable to be seen.

Peter's blog (the ex-birthday boy).

A joke and a 'doozy' promise.

Well, we'll all be waiting for Sunday.

What did he do in Dunedin?

• Find a heap of golf balls down near some river?
• Have an argument with TWO pregnant waitresses?
• Go to the local tennis club and pick a fight?
• Come across a genie who turned him back into being 71?
• Does he still have two wishes?
• Find a bottle store that specializes in Cleanskins?
• Find a shop that sells fancy woollen undies? 

I guess we'll have to wait until Sunday.

As for Robert, who knows?

'The Lord works in mysterious ways.'

* * *

Project Violin 100.

Only 94 hours to go!

Yes, I know, I'm taking it slowly, but it is a VERY hard task. One that most people would probably give up on. It's a task that can't be rushed. Every part of it presents different challenges. 

"Softly, softly catchy monkey." as my dad used to say.

I'll be reducing those 94 hours today, hopefully. Not by much though.

That's it.

I'm off.

72 today, 72 today,

He'll get a mat for his door,

He's never been 72 before.

Richard (of RBB) says he can do what he likes,

Hip, hip, hip hurray.

For he's a jolly good fellow!

72 today!

Happy Birthday Peter!

Let us hope that he finds a hairdresser today.

Oh, and Robert tells us that he will be 69 years and 9 months later this month (August 21st.)

Here's a little something for Rob...

So, who is our oldest blogger?

 Robert?

No. While he is a great supporter of gay rights, AND a woman's right to choose, when it comes to her own body, Robert is only 68 years old. Though, he will turn 69 later this month.

Richard (of RBB) is quite young too. Some readers put his age at around 27.

No. If you're looking for an old blogger, well, that's Peter (aka The Curmudgeon).

Peter turns 72 tomorrow.

YES, TOMORROW!

WHAT?

But he doesn't look a day over 71 years and 364 days!

That'll change tomorrow.

Happy Birthday Peter!

Buon compleanno. Tanti auguri a te.

72 years old!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20... 69 70 71 72!