giovedì 26 settembre 2024

Heavenly bodies.

 Peter approached the tee off for the third hole. 

Peter always wore special gloves when he played golf.

He had extra balls that he'd scampered down to the creek to get, so a few bad shots were not going to matter. He hit the ball perfectly and it sailed straight towards the green. It stopped less than a metre from the hole. Peter turned to pick up his golf bag. Straight away he noticed a perfect painting of a seagull on the side of his bag. It was obvious to his artistic eye that no sketching had been involved. He removed a glove and touched the picture. It felt warm.


"Yeah, that's me." said a nearby voice.

Peter quickly turned, but all he could see was a seagull. No one else.

"Yes, that was me." said the seagull. "I'm the Holy Ghost, though these days idiots try to call me the Holy Spirit. I prefer Ghost."

"So, what are you doing here?" asked a rather shocked Peter.

"Did you know that I'm one of only four people in Heaven that have an actual body? There's Mary, Jesus, Richus and me."

"Wow, that's impressive." said Peter. "But why did you choose a seagull body? You could have been a beautiful young woman, or a brave lion."

"Well, I didn't get invited to ascend into Heaven, so I figured I'd have to fly. At the time I was living by the sea and a seagull seemed like a good choice. Maybe I should have gone with an eagle? Anyway, Catholic numbers are dropping, so we've decided to try to attract atheists. That's how you managed such a good shot."

"Well, I would have been more impressed by a hole in one."

"I wasn't sure whether or not you were trying to avoid that little hole. I've never played this game. It's hard for a seagull to hold those big hitting things."

Right there and then Peter's shot at salvation was lost.

4 commenti:

Robert the sinner ha detto...

Third tee, third person of the Trinity....hole in one, Holy one....too many for it to be co-incidence.

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

Golf club - club - join the club - atheists going back to the fold.
Golf course fairway - fairway - it's a fair way to heaven unless you have drive. Drive - drive to green - green - Green - the Rev. Green - Cluedo - if you're clued, oh! you can go to heaven. Wedge - sand wedge - sandwich - bread - host - the body of Christ - salvation. Bread - sandwich - sand - Sandro Botticelli - painter - Madonna of the Magnificat - Mary and infant Jesus - Jesus - Jesus! Is that the time? I've got to go.

Anonimo ha detto...

But there was no hole in one. Remember Richus. It is now the holy quadruple.

Richus Christ

Anonimo ha detto...

Bur you were playing tennis and fighting with Roger.

RBB