domenica 22 settembre 2024

Sometimes it pays to shut up and be a calumnious member of the fancy suit brigade.

 

Peter hopped out of bed. He was wearing a t-shirt and shorts, so all he needed to do was put his sandals on and he was dressed. Dressed and ready to go to town.

Looking over his shoulder
to see who is impressed
by his casualness.

He'd been to the opera last night and had worn long trousers, a shirt with $50 in the pocket and dress shoes. He'd worn his usual attire (t-shirt and shorts) to bed and now he was fully dressed in almost an instant. He had a 3P* and cleaned his teeth.

Peter knew that The Old Girl would say, "Matey, you're not going out in Auckland dressed like that!" but he had memorized a phrase that he planned to hit her with. "I'd rather be a naive member of the casual dressers than a calumnious member of the fancy suit brigade."

Peter liked the sound of that. 

Unfortunately, The Old Girl was not impressed and he had to change his clothes.

He checked that the $50 was still in the pocket of his shirt. Maybe a latte would help? 


He smiled as he remembered asking for a latte in Italy and getting a glass of milk. The opera had been in Italian last night. Luckily he knew the story - he'd sat through that opera a few times before. Peter did think that it would have been easier if the opera had been in Latin.

"I'd rather be a naive speaker of Latin than a calumnious bloody Italian speaker."

Like his casual clothing choices, Peter had a tendency to wear things out, and this phrase he had picked up was no exception. As he and The Old Girl sat sipping their lattes, Peter threw in, "I'd rather be a naive sipper of lattes than a calumnious member of 3G in 1966."

In a stern voice The Old Girl told him that he was becoming a bit of a bore. For some reason Peter thought of Richard's mother.

Peter started to say, "I'd rather be a naive bore than..." He yelped as his partner poured hot latte all over his crotch. 






* that's what guys from his old 1966 class called a trip to the bathroom

6 commenti:

Robert the sinner ha detto...

Robert chuckles.

Anonimo ha detto...

Robert’s chuckle was soon shown to be calumnious as no one in their right mind would have laughed at Richard’s ‘jokes’ hence the strained expression on his face.



Anonimo ha detto...

Puttin' on my t-shirt,
Puttin' on my short pants,
Puttin' on my sandals,
Steppin' out in style.

"You're not coming to the opera dressed like that! Go and get changed!"

"Yes dear."

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

Actually it was:

Classy 'grown-up' long trousers (bought in UK in 2016 and previously worn once).
Classy long sleeve designer multi-coloured shirt (bought in Venice in about 2002 and only worn a few times.)
Classy (to me) opossum fur and merino wool vest (bought in Dunedin in 2006) and rarely worn as it's too warm up here.
Classy Ice-breaker merino wool 3/4 length coat (the Old Girl bought me in 2013). I wore it in Canada and UK a few years ago but not much since. It does hide a lot of sins including my tummy.
All well except it was a bit warm and spoilt by The Old Girl saying that my vest looked like an old man's cardigan.

Women!

Anonimo ha detto...

Thanks for the update. I think I'll sleep better tonight, knowing that.

RBB

Anonimo ha detto...

Yes. She's right about the cardigan.

RBB