An offer he couldn't refuse.

 Matte (Yes, that's the way his parents spelt his name. It wasn't Matte's fault.) was sitting on the couch and seething. He'd run into Peter (the pain in the arse from tennis) in town. Peter had reluctantly introduced his partner Lynn. I say 'reluctantly' because Peter was not a great fan of Matte. Matte had picked up that Lynn kept calling Peter Matey. On several occasions he'd tried to answer questions that he assumed were for him, only to be beaten to it by Peter. He felt like Peter was being a real cunt.

EVERYBODY'S A BIT OF A CUNT SOMETIMES

Matte came up with an idea. He would rent an indoor tennis court so that the prick named Peter couldn't turn down a rematch because of rain.

The nearest place he could find one was in Auckland and it wasn't cheap to hire, but this was something that had to be done. Next Tuesday he would wait for Peter and throw him the challenge in front of all the other club members, so that he couldn't back out. 

Matte decided to up his tennis practice. He spent two hours each day hitting a tennis ball against a wall. He also went for a short run every day. He knew he would need an enticement to get Peter to come down to Auckland. Then he remembered that Peter was a bit of a wine know all, so he started looking around for a bottle that Peter couldn't resist that he could offer as a prize for the winner. 

Matte was a traditional beer drinker and preferred older brands like Red Band and Waikato XXXX. He really knew nothing about wine.  One time he had been to a restaurant where he was served chilled red wine. He tipped the waiter generously for being so thorough with the wine preparation.

Matte looked online but most of the wine had a foreign name and was bloody expensive. "You could buy a pallet of 4X for the price of one of those bottles!" he thought. Matte headed off to countdown. He found just the bottle that he was sure would do the job. No, it wasn't a Cleanskin. It was a good Chardonnay from a region that Matte really liked. Marlborough.

Matte was going all out! He even invested in one of those wine carry bags that were colourful with little string handles. He couldn't see how that old wine expert could turn down the opportunity of winning a prize like that. The wine alone was worth $15.99!

Now it was just a matter of waiting until next Tuesday.