giovedì 25 luglio 2024

Thursday.

There is violin practice to be done.

Robert will have been up since 11pm, last night. 

Peter will be preparing to face his personal demons on the golf course.

Personal demons?

  • The need to collect even more golf balls by climbing down cliffs into quick flowing rivers.
  • The need to pass the people in front, as he speeds around the course.
  • Looking for a fight in the clubroom.
He'd be better off joining Robert at 5am Mass. I mean, if Rob's getting up at 11pm, the night before, if Peter got up at about 7pm, the night before, he'd have plenty of time to drive down. He could help out in the church shop too.


Peter: I can't find the key for the condom machine Rob, I think it's nearly empty. Hey, I could have been playing golf a bit later today.

Robert: Hang on, I'll just find a place for these boxes. We haven't got too long before Mass starts.

Peter: Do many people come to 5am Mass on a Thursday?

Robert: We normally get a good crowd. Father Orange is saying Mass, and we have a band with violins, guitars and a bass. Richard would enjoy that!

"Mass."

Peter: Yes, he does go on about bloody violins.

Robert: And he posts that silly picture of a guy holding the violin back to front with a very bad bow hold. Did you bring some rosary beads?

Peter: No, but I've got a good bottle of California Chardonnay in the car. I put my golf clubs in too, just in case.

Robert: There are rosary beads for sale, look, just over here.

Peter: Look, I might pop out and have a look down by that creek near the church. I bet there is a pair or two that have been dropped down there.

Robert: Just take mine, I'll buy another pair. Hey, we'd better get a seat, it's almost five. Starting time. There are song books in the pews.

[They find a seat not far from the front. The band starts playing. Robert hands Peter a song book and begins to sing. Peter remembers how they used to mouth the words at St. Pat's and does that.]

Robert (singing): Oh Jesus, who saved us on the cross, to become our earthly boss...

[Peter is just mouthing, with a 'singing' expression on his face.]

Robert (whispers): Come on Peter, do it for Jesus, who died for us!

Peter (whispers): You wouldn't hear me over those bloody violins. Hey, isn't that bloke on the right playing his violin the wrong way around? And he's holding his bow funny!

[Robert runs his fingers over his rosary beads and thinks that he should have just left Peter to go to golf.]

8 commenti:

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

Thursday morning is for tennis but I didn’t go because I slept in and, besides, it’s a grey and dreary day.

There’s a zero chance I would have gone to Mass although that orange gives me an idea for dinner - Pasta Siciliana.

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

In case you're wondering, I've changed my mind about the pasta Sicilia and am sticking to the tuna pizza I mentioned on the second to last very popular post over at my blog.

Anonimo ha detto...

Ma mi ne frega una sega.

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

Thank you - um, I'm cooking pizza, not frega whatever that is.
I'll make you one if you ever deign to visit.

Anonimo ha detto...

This post is pulling in thr comments!

Richard (of RBB)

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

Dictionary
Definitions from Oxford Languages · Learn more
fou
adjectiveSCOTTISH
inebriated; drunk.
"his lordship gets them fou, steamin' fou"

Yes, that fits.

Richard (of RBB) ha detto...

I made a typo! I bet you boys feel at home now.

THE CURMUDGEON ha detto...

Who’s got a red face then?