Samson.

 It seems that God was very keen to kill the Philistines. It seems that He was very much on the side of the Israelites. It seems that, when God made his mind up to wipe out a people, it was all or nothing. Check out your bible to see if this was true.

When he decided to destroy the Philistines, he picked out some soldiers to lead this task. One was named Samson and his mission, from God, was to destroy Philistines. Pretty straight forward.

Notice the hair - that's important.

It seems that his abundance of hair made him extremely strong. A guy, say Richard (of RBB), would not be able to match Samson's strength.

"Oops, I think I'll stay home and
practise my bass. I have longer
hair on my double bass bow."

The Philistines had also caught wind of Samson and his unmeasurable strength. They knew that they had to devise a plan to protect their people, because God was not going to show them any mercy.

"Hey boss, Akish here.
We need a plan. What about
that courtesan named Delilah?
She's a real babe!"

The Philistines decided that there must be a secret behind Samson's phenomenal strength. Maybe Delilah, who was both beautiful and a bit of a court slut, could help out?

Delilah was in on the plan.

 It seems that Samson wasn't the brightest guy on the block and, after a bit of 'how's your father' and a few vini, Samson coughed up the secret about his long hair. Samson fell asleep and the rest is biblical history. Samson was fucked, but this time Delelah wasn't involved.

Even though Samson had failed, God went ahead and killed the Philistines anyway - by somehow getting them to all kill each other. Well, God CAN do anything. Surprising that He doesn't seem to spare women and children. Ah well, he had to get the job done.

This was written to clear up the haircut thing for The Curmudgeon. 

It's just possible that God will be a little bewildered that Richard (of RBB), even with short hair, was still able to make the long, arduous walk to the radio mast high above in the hills.